Just Not Ready

I am just not ready to talk about auditions last night.

And clearly just not ready for dance company.

And just not ready to be recovered.

And just not ready to not have Cherry twice a week–I really needed her today.

And just not ready to deal with it on my own…as usual.

Just not ready for talking it out with my boyfriend even though he was beyond supportive and concerned when I didn’t call and leave him a message last night. And even when I told him, just not ready for him to respond.

And just not ready for the thoughts that brings with it.

And just not ready to deal with the world. Right now.

And just not ready for dance team or class tonight so I just didn’t go.

And just not ready to deal with the director who is my friend but oh wait dumb Cassie left her water bottle there so I got a message from her and asking me where I was tonight.

And just not ready to face the world. Did I mention that one yet?

I am just. Not. Ready.

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