Pissed Off

With myself. With my doctor.

I have come to realize that I have been having an allergic reaction [and a severe one] to a topical medication prescribed for my painful parts post fall. This has included first migraine, flu like syndrome, photophobia [goes with the migraine], severe redness in one eye, severe eye pain in same eye, throat swelling, hoarseness, chest tightness, shortness of breath.

When I reported this to my doctor, as well as the fact that I had to hit my emergency drug –Benadryl– last night, they just brushed me off. I told them it scared me and I could t go to work because I was so drowsy from the Benadryl. 

And yet they tell me they think it’s just a respiratory virus?

No. Whenever your patient tells you something is wrong, it is.

I know my arm is a hairline fracture on my humerus. I also fractured my ankle. But they keep brushing it off. So I just keep it to myself. Suffer alone.

I tell them I had severe adverse effects of a medication that states I need to report immediately and they say it’s nothing? I know my body. Too well. Fuck. 

I’m already so angry with my body right now I want to self harm it. I’ve been nothing but hurt and sick for several months and I cannot deal anymore. I want to fight it back. It’s its own entity–me vs my body. 

I’m physically exhausted. I’m relapsing into not eating bc I’m so tired. 

I am asking for help. Me. Cassie. Asking for help.

Just to be basically told I’m being dramatic or a hypochondriac. 

This is why I don’t ask for help. This is why I don’t seek medical attention. What good does it do?

6 thoughts on “Pissed Off

  1. Oh no 😦 have you ever had a reaction like this before? Sounds horrible! Can you go to a pharmacy to ask for something for it? (I don’t know how it works in the states!) really hope you’re feeling better soon xx

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I’m so so sorry you’re suffering this way. I’ve had some serious problems with doctors in my past as well. I think people with allergies and other auto immune problems so often get grouped in that “hypochondriac” label- it’s really infuriating. I’ve had a couple friends who never got believed at doctor’s offices only to be told later they had lyme disease! So you’re not alone- and don’t doubt yourself!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I’m sorry! Hope you feel better soon. I often have the same problem with having issues, paying tons of money to get tested and then dr tells me nothing is wrong! So then I just put up with the symptoms until it goes away… But certain things can’t be ignored!


Tell Me What You Think

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s